At first, I imagined some titles like “Come, Let’s Talk About Dreams,” “Let’s Talk About Ideals,” “Ideal Amendments” as big titles, but now I dare not even easily use small titles.
The reason I thought about the topic of “dreams” is because I no longer dare to use words like “dreams.” I don’t remember why I frequently used the word “dreams” two years ago, and I don’t dare to look back at what I wrote then. The wording and phrasing differ at different times. For example, the content of the previous post spanned one or two months, with continuous revisions in terms and content, resulting in significant changes later on. Now I might say “ideals” instead of “dreams,” perhaps because I no longer dream, and I don’t know when it started. It’s both progress and regression.
I changed jobs recently. On the first day of joining, I had lunch with the HR, and they mentioned that when they recruited in the past, they would ask if candidates had seen the source code of certain projects and asked if I had. I said no. I then said I wasn’t too worried (about myself). After getting involved with the project later, I could confirm there was indeed no need to worry. I believed I had no issues, and I needed to consider more about convincing others that I had no issues. How to convince others? For example, using slides for technical sharing. The specific content can be divided into three levels:
These three levels are progressive, and the time required is also progressive. The level of content you share may position you at a certain level, but the further you go, the more time it takes. There is never a “ready” point for technical sharing as bigger and harder problems always arise before you, before humanity. Technical sharing is one of the few options but not necessarily the best idea.
While pondering these questions, I realized a dangerous signal. I was worried about whether I could do the job, pass the probation period, and gain others’ recognition. I had never worried about these issues before (busy judging others? /facepalm). These issues can be of concern, but they should not be worries.
I also spent some money a few days ago, and suddenly felt like I had no money. Money is indeed a good thing. There is nothing wrong with liking and pursuing money. Money is a symbol of currency and an equivalent exchange item. You spend time and life to earn money, consume labor to obtain means of production in exchange for money. Money represents most social resources, which is not a bad thing.
What I need to reflect on is why, when I was looking for a job, including the past few months and last year, I told more than one person that I didn’t care about money (salary). I indeed thought so at the time. My expected salary on my resume was the same as my current salary or even a bit lower. Analyzing it now, on one hand, I had no immediate need to spend money with basic needs met, and I had no great desires. On the other hand, I believed in my technical skills, and thought as long as my skills were adequate, the salary would increase accordingly. I initially only wanted to receive pay commensurate with my abilities.
It seems I forgot my initial purpose, why I came to Beijing, why I changed jobs. If I only worry about maintaining a job with average market salary, only pursuing a stable source of funds, that is not the vision and ambition I should have. I would despise myself.
In the recommended list of Hacker News, there was an article The Top of My Todo List, by one of the founders of Hacker News. The first item on his TODO list is “Don’t ignore your dream.” I need to remind myself of this now. The article also mentions another article The Top Five Regrets of the Dying, where similar statements appear: one says “Don’t work too much,” and the other says “Don’t work too hard.” I don’t understand the meaning.
Recent interviews also reflected many issues. Currently, I have nothing to prove my experiences, to the point where I start to doubt myself. Using Alibaba’s terminology, it asks what difficult tasks you have undertaken, why they were difficult, how you did them, whether there were better approaches, and so on. If faced with such questions, I would have nothing to say because the biggest problem I encountered was not encountering difficulties. Therefore, I need to find better ways out. If I had experiences worth mentioning, I wouldn’t think of leaving.
Noteworthy experiences essentially serve as endorsements for engineering capabilities. I didn’t care much about engineering skills before, thinking just having hands would suffice, but engineering skills are actually crucial for survival. I have to care and improve because companies can relatively easily judge your engineering capabilities. Many companies are more willing to pay for your engineering skills. Programmers, right? (Question: Has this deviated from the original “dream” intention?)
A few days ago, I saw a piece of news, initially recommended on YouTube with the title The World’s Safest Cryptocurrency Was Hacked for $600 Million. I didn’t click to watch, thinking it must be human behavior, scams, etc., with the title being sensational. Later, I saw similar news on various channels, like Stolen $610 Million, Unraveling the Hacker Attack on Poly Network and O3 Swap or Poly Network hackers potentially stole $610 million: Is Bitcoin still safe?. It was said to be the most severe security incident in decentralized finance history.
Seeing the news, I couldn’t understand; Poly Network had so much money? Maybe just a marketing ploy? But many media outlets reported on it. More doubts and details won’t be pursued. The important thing is I suddenly realized I need to understand more than just the projects I am involved in. I need to grasp the entire DeFi (Decentralized Finance) and NFT (Non-fungible Token) ecosystem and market environment. That circle is quite complex… and the changes and evolution of blockchain are faster compared to the internet. In such a torrent of times…
Public chains are the true blockchain, consortium chains are just blockchain concepts for marketing, with Chinese characteristics, using new technology to solve old problems. However, I haven’t figured out the current state of public chains, and I have no conclusions yet. Often, some public chain projects emphasize the global ecosystem. Why global? Because there is no ecosystem in China.
Reflecting on the past, why did I have confidence thinking I understood consortium chains to some extent? Was it that I had seen enough to no longer see the future? There might be three reasons:
Limiting oneself to that circle leads to complacency and self-deception.
At some point in the past, I told someone, “I should become a philosopher.” Of course, I received no response.
Why a philosopher? Because the questions philosophers ponder are what everyone ponders, constantly pondered by people, and no one knows the answers. Why Socrates? Because according to legend, Socrates was a vulgar person, driven by sheer persistence. Why understand Jesus? Because Socrates or philosophers inherently carry religious connotations, with followers spreading certain thoughts.
However, if you study the history of philosophy, you’ll see various schools and historical figures proposing almost all possible viewpoints on almost all questions. Philosophical questions are predefined questions. Philosophical thoughts are exhaustively listed thoughts. Stepping back, what is philosophy? Does anyone know? The very question of what philosophy is, is a philosophical question. Perhaps each of us should set a small goal: redefine philosophy.
Many philosophers we have known since childhood are easily overlooked. Socrates, Plato, Aristotle, Epicurus to us might be like Confucius, Laozi, Mozi, Xunzi to Westerners, even including Wang Yangming. America leads the world in computer technology but lacks renowned philosophers due to its short history. Germany, on the other hand, boasts famous philosophers like Schopenhauer and Nietzsche. I once had doubts about this. In technical fields, cutting-edge information is certainly from America. But in other fields, what are the reliable sources, and where are they?
Recently, the Ministry of Human Resources and Social Security released a monitoring report on new generation migrant workers. This seems to be the first time the term “new generation migrant workers” was clearly used. It’s a normal statistical report, published